The Riku Review
by edwardsgirl16
Summary: Riku's view on everything from games to movies to books. Sora helps out in ways and there will be yaoi in it. Kinda like Zemyx Time in ways, but Soriku with a few other pairings tossed in and complete randomness. Rated T for yaoi and language.


**Okay, this is a different version of Zemyx Time. Kind of. I'll try to upload every week if it's liked, but I can't promise anything.**

**WARNING: A ****lot**** of stuff is gonna get bashed in here. We're not trying to be mean, we're ever bashing stuff ****we**** like, too. So, please, don't take offense to anything we bash. At the end, we'll probably give our own opinions on what we mention.**

*****END*****

Riku looked at the camera pointed at him, sitting Indian-style in the middle of his bed. "Welcome to the Rik—" He stopped, frowning. "Hang on a sec." He leaned forward, pressing the record button on the camera. "Better. Welcome to the Riku Review. A time to reflect on—"

"Hey, Riku!"

Riku groaned slightly as Sora bounced onto the bed next to him. "Sora, can't you see I'm in the middle of something?" he asked, motioning at the camera.

"Did Xemnas give you your own show, too?" Sora asked excitedly, a smile still on his face. "Is it gonna be like Zemyx Time? I love Zemyx Ti—"

"Sora," Riku interrupted, covering the brunette's mouth with a hand, "shut up. Please. This isn't like Zemyx Time. That show just shows how much of an idiot Demyx is and how much of a horny bastard Zexion is. And the rest of the Organization, come to think of it."

"Demyx isn't an idiot, Riku!" Sora pouted. "That's not nice!" He thought for a second. "Riku?"

"Hmm?"

"What's a horny bastard?"

The silverette froze. "Uh…" he tried to explain, "I-I'll tell you later, Sor. But whatever you do, don't ask Axel or Xigbar or Marluxia what it means, okay?"

"Why not?"

"Because…" A light bulb went off. "Because you'll blow up if you ask." _Great, even Demyx wouldn't believe that._

"I could blow up?"

_Wow._ "Yes. But you won't if you never ever ever ask those three what it means, okay?" The brunette nodded. "Promise." Another nod. "Good."

It was silent for a few minutes, just the sounds of breathing and Riku flipping through books. "Riku?" Sora asked.

"Mhmm?" Riku kept looking through his books when he answered.

"What is your show about?" the brunette asked.

"I'm giving my opinions on things," the silverette replied, moving a strand of hair out of his eyes. "Books, movies, music, whatever."

"Toys?"

"If you want."

"Can I help?"

Riku groaned softly, looking at the sparkling blue eyes next to him. His own sea-green eyes refused to look away until he finally caved. "If you're good, you can help," he reluctantly agreed.

Sora grinned hysterically, leaning forward to tackle the older with a hug and a kiss. "Thanks so much, Riku!" he exclaimed happily, leaning back again.

Riku blushed, running a hand through his hair. "N-No prob, Sor," he stuttered.

"What's your topic this week?" Sora asked, bringing his knees up to his chest, playing with the handle of his Kingdom Key.

"Books," Riku replied. "Stop playing with my Keyblade."

"It's mine," Sora argued, holding the key close.

"It's mine. Give it back."

"Mine."

"Mine."

"No."

"Yes."

"No."

"Yes!"

"No! Get away!"

Riku grabbed Way To Dawn, hand tightening on the handle as he restrained himself from hitting the brunette. "I'm the rightful Keyblade bearer," he growled.

"No," Sora argued again. "The Keyblade chose me."

"Fine, we'll let our readers choose," Riku said, turning back to the camera. "Anyone reading this, review with your choice of who should be the rightful Keyblade bearer. Me or Sora."

"Me," Sora muttered.

"Shut up and let me get on with my show," Riku muttered. He set Way To Dawn behind him, picking up a book.

"What's the first book?" Sora asked, setting the Kingdom Key behind him.

"Some book series called 'Pendragon'," Riku replied, flipping through the book. "Zexion has the whole series in his room. All 10 of them."

"What're they about?"

"Some kid goes to different worlds and fights off evil things from each world and tries to stop this one guy who wants to take over al the worlds and…hang on a second." He flipped to the cover.

"What're you doing?" Sora wondered.

"Seeing if you look like the kid in this," Riku mumbled, looking at the boy on the cover then up at Sora. "This is basically what you do except your worlds are all Disney, your fight Heartless with a Keyblade and your bad guy is Xemnas."

"Copyright!" Sora exclaimed.

Riku grinned. "Exactly," he agreed.

"Does that mean I can sue?"

"If you want."

"Awesome! I'm gonna go get the paperwork!"

"Sora!" Riku sighed, watching the brunette run out of his room and down the hall. "Well, while he's gone, I might as well get on to another book. Let's see…" He flipped through the first Pendragon book quickly. "Actually, I never gave my opinion for these." He thought for a second. "I guess they're okay, but it's kinda just like what Sora does." He opened the first book to the first page. "I mean, come on. This is the first sentence. 'I hope you're reading this, Mark.'" He sighed, closing the book. "Stupid."

"Riku!"

The silverette turned just as Sora bounced back on the bed, a stack of papers in his hands. "Xemnas signed them already," he said, grinning as he handed him the papers.

"I'll send them by Zexion later," Riku muttered, setting them aside and picking up another book. "Now, this book series is called 'Artemis Fowl'."

"Sounds cool," Sora commented. "What's it about? Ooh! Is it about birds?"

Riku rolled his eyes and shook his head, flipping to the first page. "No, not about birds," he explained. "It's about this kid who is a super-smart genius and tries to understand and involve himself in the world of fairies and magic and stuff like that. His name is Artemis Fowl."

"Sounds kinda hard to understand," the brunette said, looking through a book. "Riku! It's too many words! Too long!"

"Calm down, Sor," Riku said, bringing the shorter to sit in his lap. "It is hard to understand unless you can think through it. Kinda more of Zexion's style. Listen to the first sentence. 'How does one describe Artemis Fowl?' Well, we don't know. That's what you're supposed to tell us, you fuckin' book! We're not supposed to think!"

"Riku, calm down," Sora said, bringing the book out of his hand and putting another in. "What about this one?"

"No more today," the silverette muttered, throwing the book behind him. "My brain hurts from too many words. Come on, Sor. We're going to the library."

"What for?" Sora asked as he was pulled off the bed.

"To do some…studying," Riku smirked, pulling the brunette out.

"But, Riku! The camera!"

*****END*****

**Kinda short, but I just wanted to get a chapter out before I leave the country for 2 weeks and nothing gets posted. Hope ya'll liked it and I hope ya'll will review and say I should continue. **

**Our opinions:**

**Pendragon: A good series, when I first read it when I was about 10 or so. Fantasy and good, I guess.**

**Artemis Fowl: I actually ****really**** loved it. It was interesting and I couldn't put them down the second I started.**

**I'll try to figure out a signature sign-off line for Riku later, so I'll see ya'll next time.**


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